The Plight of the Earrings.

Jewelry is one of my guilty pleasures.

Oprah and football are the other two.

When it comes time to shop for me, be it Christmas, Easter, my birthday, or just Wednesday, I'm a fairly easy person to shop for. A gift card to Barnes and Noble or Target will fit just fine. So will earrings. I love earrings. Shiny earrings. Loopy earrings. Silver earrings. Gold earrings. Bedazzled earrings. You name it.

If for some reason, you still have a problem finding a present for me, I have 40 Bible Study girls who laugh at my jewelry collection but are very capable of providing more pieces to add to it. Call them up and take them shopping with you.

Anyhow, my mother knows better than anyone how much I love jewelry.

She also was with me when I ventured off to Vegas in August.

As we were walking around the largest whole-sale jewelry sale ever to grace the face of this planet, she mentioned that she had zero ideas for me for Christmas. If there was anything that I saw that was too expensive for my wallet, she'd happily pick up the bill and add it to my stocking.

I knew the exact pair of earrings I wanted.

The trouble was, I saw them at the beginning of the show and we were now at the end of the building. It wasn't exactly like I could walk over and hand them to her--the jewelry show is in a warehouse about the size of three football fields.

I sighed a little sigh and moved on with my life, realizing the earrings were never going to be mine.

A short time later, Hannah, Granny, Mama, and I found a little table at a Starbucks and sat down for refreshments and a rest. As we sat there, us Perry women, I couldn't stop thinking about these earrings. I wanted them so badly. They were perfect, and beautiful, and shiny, and they had diamonds, and I swear Khloe Kardashian had a pair almost exactly like them.

I looked at Hannah and Granny and told them of my desperate need for these bedazzled treasures. I told them that I had seen the earrings at the beginning of the show, and they were laid sideways on a black tablecloth-covered showcase.

We Perry Women are mighty stubborn. We're stubborn, and we're sassy, and there's no getting our focus off of a mission once we've committed to one. You best believe we committed ourselves to this mission. We hauled ourselves back into the jewelry show for one more lap to attempt to find these earrings.

As I was walking down Aisle 6, I knew we had lost hope. The earrings were either gone, or I had imagined them.

And then...

Then...

I heard this noise.

It sounded like...

No...there was no way...

"Rebekah! Are these them?"

There was no way Granny had found my earrings.

I turned a full 180 degrees and saw that she was standing beside a table that had a black tablecloth on it, and this little Korean woman trying to tend to her every need.

I remembered that Korean lady.

My eyes were suddenly caught by a twinkle in in Granny's hand.

MY EARRINGS!!!

I rushed over and inspected them and quickly had Mama thrust some cash into the lady's hand as to make sure that no one else showed up and wanted them. I would have to wrestle said person to the ground as my mom made a run for the taxi.

But no, the earrings were mine.

Now, all I had to do was wait until the morning of December 25th to open my stocking.

December 25th was four days ago. Four days ago I opened my stocking. When I opened my stocking four days ago, the little package whose content twinkled fell gracefully into my lap. I was reunited with them once again.

I was still in love with these earrings.

I was so excited to wear them.

I wore them all Christmas day.

...I currently have no idea where these earrings are.

Seriously.

After all of that, I think that I have lost these earrings. There's no telling where they have ended up.

If you're the praying type, I'd appreciate it if you sent one up to The Big Guy for my earrings. I'll be tearing up my parents house today in one last attempt to find these articles of perfection.

I'm just a girl...sitting in front of her computer...asking for her earrings back.

(name that movie...)